Self-care is everywhere these days — from TikTok tips to wellness podcasts to those “treat yourself” memes. It sounds simple enough: take care of yourself. Rest. Recharge. Eat a vegetable.
So why does it often feel… overwhelming, confusing, or just plain out of reach?
Wait — am I not already doing self-care?
Let’s break it down.
Self-care = care for myself.
Right. Got it.
Look after myself? Mind myself? Of course I do — I’m still standing, aren’t I?
I’ve got a great job. The team says I’m smashing it.
The kids are thriving.
I’m chipping away at this mortgage.
So… isn’t that self-care?
Well. Maybe.
Also — maybe not.
Because here I am, wide awake at 11:47pm, buzzing from my fifth coffee, typing out a blog instead of getting a decent night’s sleep.
And now I’m judging myself for that too.
“Why do I keep doing this?”
The spiral: doing it all… and still feeling off
I start convincing myself:
I should stay up late reading the news.
I should get up early to be ahead for work.
I should be able to hold it all together and still have energy to meet friends at the weekend.
But underneath it all, there’s that same feeling —
Anxious. Tired. Wired. Empty.
And not once have I stopped to ask:
What do I actually need right now?
Listening to the part of you that’s trying to help
Maybe this anxious feeling isn’t here to ruin me.
Maybe it’s here to gently (or loudly) say:
“You’re not just a provider or performer.
You’re a human. You need care too.”
Self-care isn’t always about gym sessions or green smoothies.
Sometimes, it’s choosing rest over routine.
Or noticing when your inner critic is being a bit of a jerk.
Or recognising that your “stay up late and overwork” pattern might be less productivity, more self-sabotage.
A small question that changes everything
Before the next cup of coffee, the next late night, the next “just keep going”…
Try pausing for a moment and asking:
What do I need right now?
Not what’s expected.
Not what looks good.
Not what everyone else is doing.
Just… what you need.
Start there. That’s self-care too.
Want support figuring it out?
If you’re stuck in overthinking, overworking, or over-functioning — you’re not alone. Talking it through can help. I offer individual counselling sessions in Swords that create space to understand what you need and how to respond with kindness — not guilt.